A look I never want to see again

Yesterday was Thursday and my day off. But I told Sue, my manager, that would come in after school and help out. While there I kept thinking "why did I tell Sue I would come in".

One of my fellow co-workers and friends is a 40-year-old woman with 9 children, and one grandchild. It amazes me, it sounds as though she has practically raised the children by herself, even though she has a husband. Her third oldest daughter also works with me and is my friend. Recently her oldest son started working with us as well.

Last night she was scheduled to close the photo lab. I was eating my lunch outside and I see her running out side, her face a combination of pale and red, tears flying down her face. She sees me and yells something to me, but I can't here her through all the tears and loud traffic of the parking lot. But I could make out enough "....go.... daughter... sorry" and that was enough. I said it's ok and told her to go. I knew someone in the store would know what was going on.

Her saying sorry to me was because the meant I had to finish the film left in the photo lab and shut it down... but trust me I didn't mind.

She had gotten a call saying her daughter had committed suicide. Next the few people who knew... other management and the people who heard her scream because the work near the photo lab, started wondering if it was the daughter that worked with us. I told them it couldn't have been because she would have used her name and some one else heard her say older daughter. I started putting it together... her oldest daughter only 23. She had recently told me that her daughter started some kind of anti-depressant and asked me id 23-year-old could really be that depressed. She didn't understand and I gave her some advice... telling her the depression is serious and her daughter did the right thing to start taking meds even if this only temporary.

I kept hoping and praying that it was some kind of miscommunication or only an attempt and that her daughter was no in fact dead. We waited and waited for a call and the more we waited the worst it felt and sounded.

Finally call and her daughter was ok... only an attempt. I hope they get her the right treatment.

I will never forget that look though. It is the worst look I have ever seen. The look of a mother that thought her daughter was gone forever. A mother who loves her children so much, and scared to death that something was wrong. The way her body looked when she ran to her car, it was like she wanted to tellaport right to her daughter's side.

I never want to see that again.... but I am so happy that her daughter is still alive. And I hope she doesn't blame herself or think that those of us that knew what was going on blame her, or think that makes her a bad mother... becasue it doesn't.

A Castle in Colorado

For over 30 years, Jim Bishop has been building a castle on a mountainside in central Colorado. "Did it all myself, don't want any help," he says mechanically as he unloads a pile of rocks that he's hoisted to the 70-foot level on one of the castle towers.
Every year since 1969, Bishop has single-handedly gathered and set over 1000 tons of rock to create this stone and iron fortress in the middle of nowhere. Bishop calls it "a monument to hardworking people" and "America's biggest, one-man, physical project." "I always wanted a castle. Every man wants a castle," Bishop continues, his voice a broken record, answering the same questions he's obviously been asked thousands of times before.
It hasn't been easy. For most of those 30 years Bishop was engaged in a running battle with Washington bureaucrats over the rocks that he used, which came from the San Isabel National Forest that surrounds the castle property. Bishop felt that they were his for the taking, the government wanted to charge him per truckload. Another bone of contention that stuck in Bishop's craw belonged to the Colorado state Chamber of Commerce, which refused to list Bishop Castle as an attraction in its official tourism guides.
Happily, those angry years are in the past. Both Uncle Sam and the Colorado Chamber now recognize that Bishop's dementia concretia is marketable, and that he's transformed some heavy, unwanted rocks into pure tourism gold.
The castle is a popular spot. "I been here three times," said one visitor. "I'm taking my kids to see what one man can do," said another. Other popular comments: "He's crazy," "Where does he get the time?" and "Where does he get the money?" Bishop's goal is to complete his castle before he dies. He has no thought of slowing down. Although the castle is still just a hollow shell of cemented rocks and ornamental ironwork (Jim Bishop's regular line of business), his future plans include a moat and a drawbridge, a roller coaster mounted on the castle's outer wall, a balcony big enough to hold an orchestra, and a second castle for Phoebe, his wife.
"I want to live as long as I can and keep building that castle bigger and bigger and bigger."
(source http://www.roadsideamerica.com/attract/COBEUcastle.html) or

http://sangre-de-cristo.com/westcliffe/visitors_guide/Bishops_Castle.htm

Andy and went there on Saturday. It was awesome. I have lived in Colorado all my life and never knew this thing was here. I had to find what someone else wrote about it because I couldn't even put it in words.

Pictures of the castle